Jaws dropped all over the city this morning leaving local health officials scratching their heads. "It's amazing. It seems that the entire city's jaw dropped this morning," one observer said, "some all the way to the floor!"
Dropped Jaw Syndrome (DJS) seemed to have struck city wide as people opened their morning papers and read the headline that the Midland City Council has awarded former city manager Rick Menchaca a golden handshake worth $481,158.
In a search of an explanation for the DJS attack, local health officials consulted with big city experts. "Quite often the DJS is accompanied by bulging eyes, and on occasion, the screaming of epithets," one expert explained. "Shock is the usual cause. In a small community like Midland where everyone is under the impression that their government is prudent, ethical and above board then something like an outlandish gift to a former city manager comes as a complete surprise. It takes time to process. It's like discovering that Santa Clause was a wino in a costume working a temporary job.
"We don't see this in the big cities like Houston or San Antonio because the voters and taxpayers are no longer surprised at what their governments do. So that first time is an eye opener and a jaw dropper," the expert explained. "But don't worry, the next time they may not even notice," he said, chuckling.
Area residents were seen picking up their jaws and wandering off in a daze, some saying things like, "what the ....?" "You call this a compromise?" "Menchaca asked for the sun and the moon, and they gave it to him! What secrets does he have over those five Council members that they were so afraid would come out in a trial?"
Updated 6/28/07: More evidence of DJS right here:
The collective jaw of Midland probably dropped an inch or two this week upon learning the City Council approved a $481,158 settlement agreement with City Manager Rick Menchaca. ...
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