Sleepless in Midland has obtained an exclusive interview with Osama bin Laden's wife number 3, Amal Ahmed Abdulfattah. Check it out.
Sleepless: You got married when you were 18 years old. What did you see in Osama bin Laden?
Wife 3: Well, he's tall, and that's hot. But there's just something sexy about an old guy with a long gray beard wearing a robe -- it's an Arab thing. Plus, some girls have a thing for bad boys, you know? Oh yeah, I should probably mention I didn't have a choice. It was either "I do" or "I die."
Sleepless: What was it like sharing a husband three times your age with two other wives?
Wife 3: Well, just between you and me, that old Arab had trouble pitching a tent. He had these little blue pills, but the world's most wanted man couldn't keep the jihad going under the robe, if you get my drift. So I had plenty of time for meditation. And MTV.
Sleepless: You took a bullet for him?
Wife 3: Part of the job -- walking first in line through a mine field, that sort of thing. It's in the wedding vow: "Do you promise to honor, obey, be a human shield?"
Sleepless: When Seal Team 6 burst through the door what did you think?
Wife 3: I thought they were selling magazines, but they were all "Where's bin Laden? Where's bin Laden?" I was like, "WTF! Don't you people knock?" Then all hell broke loose.
Sleepless: What will you do now?
Wife 3: I plan to hit the club scene and put the "bad" in Abbottabad, if you know what I mean. Then I hope to get a spot on "The View" or "Oprah" and plug my reality show idea: "The Real Housewives of Islamic Jihad."
Sleepless: Thank you.
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